Up Close & Personal with Aaron
Hi my name is Aaron Aker. I'm a 35 year old Caucasian, heterosexual male living with HIV. I have been married twice; divorced once and widowed once. I have two wonderful teenage boys who are my life.
I am a self employed contractor who does windows and siding and whatever other construction needs are out there. I don't have a lot but what I do have is mine and I have worked since I was 15 and will continue to work as long as I can.
I was first diagnosed in November of 2009, at that time. I had got it from my wife whom I had known she was positive from the time I met her. For many years we were safe and practiced safer sex practices. I also was tested every six months prior to her ending up in the hospital for the last time. I ended up with HIV and am living well with it now.
I have never had much, but what I have I love and care for. I got my HIV from my second wife and am doing what I have to; to stay alive and raise my kids in a loving, caring home.
I am here to tell my story, show my face, to help fight the stigma and show we are human beings like each and every other person out there. We are not dangerous people and we all have feelings, just like the person next to us. I want to share my strength and experience with others to show there is hope even living with HIV.
A Day in the Life of My Body
Wow what a really crazy month this has been for my page on the site and outside of it. I want to start by saying I knew people was ignorant about or disease and or scared of us but not as hateful as I have seen this month. This writing is going to cover some of the hatred that we endure as we live our lives.
First it started with a person who decided to judge who we can or cannot love in our life on my own web-page. I was attacked for loving someone who is HIV- but that is not what I go searching for. When I go searching for love it is what love brings to me and I judge no one for anything. If it works out than it works out and when you find true love it has no boundaries in life. There are many things that have been running through my head from this and some text messages I have received in the last week.
We don't go out looking for people who don't have it and look to infect them. To be more accurate there are negative people who go looking for us to get themselves infected to get things that they think we do and or to get us in trouble for infecting them. Personally I feel better being with a HIV+ person this way I'm not putting no one in the same position that I am in because I would not wish this on my worst enemy. Seems it is “SHAME ON US”. Makes me laugh now that I have thought about this and seen what all my fans had written after he had posted this. Seems as though this person was only attacking me on the website, but it was a real learning experience for me on this subject. I am here to educate others and to help fight the stigma and now I see we need it more than ever.
In the last few days I have gotten some revolting text messages from a person whom I was trying to get involved with. I have now been labeled as a “PREDATOR” and that those “who with HIV/AIDS should be isolated” We” should be labeled as silent killers, and should be treated as such”
This is what we have to deal with on a daily basis and at times because of the negative people like this we want to give up. There are some who don't look at us this way and those are the ones we will lean on for support. We also find other support with the ones who are also positive. We are one big family whom will stand next to each other when in need of the support.
My hopes from these last couple of months is that these people will come to see that we are human beings like everyone else is and we have some real feelings even when we have lost all motivation to keep going we don't want to go like the others have before us and we are using them as our motivation to keep going and live the best life we possibly can.
I myself have found love in an HIV+ individual and am very happy. I have never just went searching for a negative partner to be with, all I am looking for is someone to love me for me and one who does not care that I have a little extra something in my blood. This is not who I am, it is something that goes with me wherever I am and is not something I can get away from now. Below is a list of things to help others understand what HIV really is and that it is not something that needs isolated and or contained away from other people. It's out there and it can come to anyone who has sex, gets a blood transfusion, or has contact with an individual who has this.
NO you can NOT get it from touching hugging or even kissing.
As far as the kissing is concerned if the individual who has HIV has cuts in their mouth then yes there is that possibility of getting it. Also if the infected partner is on the medications for it called antivirals there is less risk in transmission of it.
I also want to add my personal email in-case there are any questions from anyone who reads this.
Either one you can reach me at.
First link is about our medications which we take every day for the rest of our lives.
This link is the safer sex links by which we go by living with our HIV.
http://www.poz.com/archive/2005_Aug_348.shtml
This link is for safe vaginal intercourse.
http://www.poz.com/articles/348_2124.shtml
This link is for anal intercourse.
http://www.poz.com/articles/348_2125.shtml
Oral-Penile sex
http://www.poz.com/articles/348_2126.shtml
Oral-Vaginal sex
http://www.poz.com/articles/348_2127.shtml
Oral-Anal sex
http://www.poz.com/articles/348_2128.shtml
Digital-Anal or digital Vaginal sex
http://www.poz.com/articles/348_2129.shtml
Last but not least the page with all the info on it I love to use. For those of you who are still reluctant on the kissing thing there is one way to get it through kissing, and that is if the person whom has HIV is bleeding from the gums or anywhere in their mouth can pass the virus on to you.
http://www.health.ny.gov/diseases/aids/facts/questions/transmission.htm
MUCH LOVE AND HAPPINESS TO EVERYONE!!!
Aaron
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